Back-to-School Shopping Mall of Horrors

No, the title isn't misleading. Yes, I know it's October already and Back-To-School shopping is long gone....however, it has taken me this long to recover from one particular shopping trip with DramaQueen in early September. Thus, you are reading a belated post ;)

Shopping with a teenage daughter is tricky at best. A lot depends on mood.... not just her mood, but MY mood too. I was feeling extraordinarily patient one September day and agreed to go to the BIGGEST mall in the universe...located right here in my home town (lucky me).

Apparently these are the textbooks that fashionistas are studying.

I thought of comparing this shopping trip to an ocean cruise...sometimes feeling like I'm on a 5-star Princess cruise ship...and other times feeling like I'm in a deflating life raft without a paddle.

We "cruised" happily into the first store and ended up fairly soon in the change room. That's where things started to deteriorate.

Conversation in Fitting Room:

ME: That's cute!
DQ: No, it's not.

{next outfit}
ME: That's cute!
DQ: NO, it's NOT!

{14 outfits later}
ME: Ummmmm...isn't that shirt see-through??
DQ: That's the whole point!!

I wish I had photos for you from the Fitting room, but that would have been too creepy.

Instead, I took photos while waiting OUTSIDE the Fitting Room {mwaahaa...evil laughter}

Here's a lovely t-shirt....

The "feminist" in me really enjoys the nude images of women that form a skull.  How artistic!

And check out this delightful tag on a tank top....

Sorry for the poor quality photo.....all these teen stores have horrible lighting.

Let me type out what is printed on the tag:  "Keep out of Reach of Good Girls"  then below that: "Successful Loving Tablet"  "1 capsule" 

See that pink circle?  That is actually a pink tablet/pill in a plastic enclosed bubble.  Egads.  What the ??

After spending most of the day in dimly lit stores that have pounding music and are masquerading as nightclubs, we entered a happy place, all bright and colourful.

This store is Victoria Secret for teens...called "PINK"

I don't know about you, but all of my bras and panties when I was 14 years old were BEIGE.  Not even white.  And definitely NOT black (that colour was only for bad girls!)  Now the girls can buy RAINBOW underwear!

I had a devilish thought while she was trying on stuff in this Pink store....why not buy an extra large thong in neon pink for myself.  But no, I knew DQ wouldn't find the humour in that, and I could not put up with anymore eyerolling.

Instead, I sat quietly and watched all the other middle-aged moms stand in the check-out line with the same dazed and confused looks on their faces as me.

And that helped..a little...knowing that I'm not alone on this mothership that's being tossed about in the storm called "Hurricane Adolescence."

I can't wait til we come to port...in like 10 years or so??